"Beef"
What it is: After a mouthpiece, or piece of instrument is dropped and makes that ping, we all say "Beef."
Why we do it: for fun, why else How it originated: From Jim Cook: “We started calling [Scott McGuire] 'beef' the first time we met him. We used to make all the rookies stand during our first meeting and tell us lots of information about themselves. After listening to him banter about his damned cattle farm and how he would bring us steaks during the season, one of the other rookies, 'Booster', just shouted out Beef to shut him up. For the remainder of the year anytime anyone dropped anything, or started long boring stories… the term 'BEEF' would echo throughout. Sad…but true.” Battle BonesWhat it is: Your hat is stolen during the homecoming parade by drunken frat boy, or disgruntled Iowa fan; you get your hat back by any means necessary, and don’t return to the band until you have it.
Why we do it: if we don’t we are out of uniform. How it originated: It happened before, so let it be written, so let it be done. ConvoyWhat it is: The section sings the chorus to Convoy as we leave somewhere on buses
Why we do it: Because we do How it originated: Tater started singing it, made it a full time tradition in 2000. "We got a great big convoy Rockin' through the night Yeah, we got a great big convoy Ain't she a beautiful sight C'mon and join our Convoy Ain't nothin' gonna get in our way We gonna roll this truckin' convoy 'Cross the USA Convoooy Convoooy" Ski-U-Mah Plume CheerWhat It Is: Taking your plume in your hand, starting on your left and moving it to the right hten to the left and back right around in a circle while slowly saying Ski-U-Mah. You need to see it to understand the definition. This is done with 4:00 left in the 4th quarter at every football game. The correct way to notify the section that we are about to do the cheer is by saying "Time check!"
Why We Do It: No other section does anything like it. How it originated: About 1996, the basketball band was in the Sweet 16, and some cheerleader from the 30’s showed the trombones there a cheer they used to do in the 30’s. It became a Bone cheer when we replaced the pom-pons with the plume of our hats. Bone Bus ButlerWhat it is: The Bone Bus Butler runs to grab a bus for the Bones only! Occasionally other instruments sneak on somehow… He/she also enforces the bus rules.
Why we do it: So we get our own bus, wouldn’t you do the same thing? How it originated: We had to take buses to the Metrodome for all home games. Because of the move to TCF Bank Stadium in 2009, the Bone Bus Butler plays a lesser role. However, they are still responsible for fulfilling their role when we take buses to other places. The uniform includes a fake moustache and a bow tie. What does the Bone Bus Butler say:“Welcome to the Bone Bus. The following rules apply: no singing, no dooking, and no pooking!” We added "No pooking" in 2015 after Drake Bauer pooked on the bus at the Quick Lane Bowl in Detroit. Who is the current Bone Bus Butler: The 2022 Bus Butler has yet to be chosen. Past Bus Butlers: 2021: Ethan Kay 2020: N/A due to COVID-19 2019: Carter Johnson 2018: Cole "McCool" McClure 2017: Jack Dougherty 2016: Sheryl Patricelli 2015: Scott "Scooter" Addington 2014: Ben "Big Ben" Gualtieri 2013: Drake Bauer 2012: Tom Hack 2011: Ben "Half-Price" Alfveby 2010: Alex "Bombay" Elert 2009: Mandi Hansen 2008: Mitch "Glue Boy" Mills 2007: Mike "Boone" Weum 2006: Trevor "Flounder" Anderson 2005: Brian "Boof" Davis 2004: Nick "Fargo" Lindberg 2003: Bryan "SpAz" Nelson 2002: James "Buttons" Klovstad 2001: Bill "Waldo" Siitari 2000: Pamm Reigel 1999: Derek "Ladies Man" Barto 1998: Bridget "Scarface" Ehemann 1997: Troy "Tater" Tatting 1996: Heather Stoy 1995: Nancy "Buck-Fity" Sjolander 1994: Scott "Beef" McGuire Bone SpinsWhat it is: We spin on our bones like baseball bats after the last game of the year.
Why we do it: From Jim Cook: “We used to do the bone-kicks, which I see you still do, just real spontaneously after touchdowns or field goals. So we switched it up on him and started spinning around our horns. Because none of us liked being told what to do. Again, we were assholes. This proved not very smart during one game when we scored 59 points. Eventually Becher got pissed off enough he banned us from doing anything." Due to new school-owned horns and a new band seating arrangement, Bone Spins were relegated to only after the last game of the season, and only seniors would participate. Bone Jit-SuWhat it is: The official martial art of the University of Minnesota Trombone Section. Using our Trombones (not school horns!) as weapons, epic battles took place across the practice field. The objective was to hit your opponent with your horn, while not damaging it.
Why we did it: Because our Trombones looked like weapons, and it looked cool. Note: Since we started using school horns for everything in 2009, this has been discontinued. CadencesWhat it is: During the various drumline cadences, we have our own section cheers.
Why we do it: Every section in the band does their own thing for these cadences, and they make us unique. Some of them are staples that have been there for years; others change as they get stale and we have a new inside joke to put in its place. Llama School - Sifl and Olly Where's My Burrito - Homer Simpson I'm On A Boat - Lonely Island You're Fired - Donald Trump Space Jam - Quad City DJs Doo Dah Doo Doo! - Tim and Eric Row the Boat - P.J. Fleck Glue BoyWhat it is: This nickname is given to people whose first and last names are 1 syllable.
Why we do it: From Pat Toft: “To my knowledge, that started in 1992, Cook’s rookie year. Kari Sprague, a mellophone player who, despite being a very nice and generally reputable person, would occasionally socialize with trombone section members, took to yelling “Jim Cook eats glue” at any opportunity. Nobody has any idea what she meant. By 1993, Cook was tired of this, and somehow convinced Kari and Ben Metcalf (the only other person to yell this) to transfer the glue-eating appellation to me. Thus, it became “Pat Toft eats glue.” Since the only logic behind both my and Jim’s glue-eating was our monosyllabic names, when Dave Lien joined the band he became the next Glue Boy." How it originated: See above. Other Glue Boys: Nick Seel, Joe Ure, Mark May, Ray Lin, Tom Hack, Mitch Mills, Matt Maus, Dave Friese, Jim Cook, Pat Toft, Dave Lein, John Roers, Matt Klein, Matt Lund, Steve Marth, Zach Hill, Nate Fong Ninja SwipingWhat it was: Taking somebody’s mouthpiece out of their horn when we have short breaks.
Why we did it: To tell people they have to be careful of their instruments, and you are dumb for leaving it in. What happened after a ninja swipe:See Endzone Toss and Spiking, also, if you have a nice person who swiped it, they may give it back with a warning, or they may make you play hide and seek to find who has it. Most important rule of Ninja Swiping: No Ninja-Swiping of school horns. How it originated: From Pat Toft: “Bob Strootman started both of these sometime around 1994 or 1995. He claimed he did it to encourage vigilance, but in reality he was just a very bad person. (Not that I’m judging or anything. I think it’s safe to say that numerous members of the section contributed to our reputation in the rest of the band as a group whose primary traits consisted of thuggery, poor personal hygiene, deviance, and a general lack of empathy. I note that this still seems to be the case). Trombone section members briefly experimented with spiking other equipment, such as tuning slides and non-trombone players’ mouthpieces. That got people pretty angry and was quickly abandoned.” Note: As of 2001, Ninja Swiping and Spiking have been instituted for beater horns only. As of 2009, the section has used school horns for all practices and performances. Therefore, these traditions are rarely upheld. SpikingWhat it was: Taking somebody’s mouthpiece and pressing in vertically into the ground or other substance (ice cream, peanut butter, etc.), thereby filling the mouthpiece with said substance.
Why we did it: To tell people they have to be careful of their instruments, and you are dumb for leaving it in. What happened after a spiking: Owner of mouthpiece can be seen digging stuff out of mouthpiece. How it originated: see "Ninja Swiping" Note: As of 2001, Ninja Swiping and Spiking have been instituted for beater horns only. As of 2010, the section has used school horns for all practices and performances. Therefore, these traditions are rarely upheld. Knuckle MessagesWhat it is: Older membes of the section write things on their knuckles before a game
Why we do it: Why not? How did it originate: From Pat Toft: “Started in 1996 and also practiced by, of all people, the flagline. Basically just a good way to display forbidden messages of any sort during a game (since your hands would be gloved during inspection, the director never noticed it). Who are some past examples?:“Werz Brez” “Corn Dogs” “Sped Racr” stuff like that. This tradition was discontinued in 2011, but revitalized in 2021. "Tmabone Musical Institute" CakeWhat it is: We get a cake that says “Tmabone Musical Institute” on it on homecoming day.
Why we do it: Food, why else? How it originated: In 1999, Doug Hawkins got a cake for the Saturday practice, and he called Cub Foods and asked for a cake “…with a picture of a trombone, that’s a musical instrument.” Cub Foods gave him a cake that said "Tmabone Musical Institute" instead, and it became such a big joke that a rookie will get one every year before the homecoming game. Note: Please contact the Trombones if you got a cake between 2000 and 2012. Past cakes (through 2013) provided by: 2021: Devon McCarthy 2020: N/A due to COVID-19 2019: Zack "Special K" Stockdale-Pederson 2018: Michael "Spicy" Benjamin Spiese 2017: Tanner "Babe" Binczak 2016: Kenna Ryan 2015: Joe "Hardcore" Ure 2014: Nathan Kaufman 2013: Drake Bauer 1999: Doug Hawkins Traditions from Former Bone Sites |
"Doug Hawkins arranged Rubber Duckey so we could [mess] with the Oregon band (from the 1999 Sun Bowl), same reason Tater came up with School's Out to play back to Oregon after the 32432678th time they played it. We played it back to them 2 times before our director told us not to do it anymore. And when half of Oregon's school song sounded like one of ours, we began singing our lyrics to it."
On the 1999 Sun Bowl: "During the game we just blew Oregon out of the water. Les Mis was so loud that CBS had to turn down our microphone! To make a long story short, we, the Bones, asserted our claim as Rank of the Millennium with our snappy slide covers, Rubber Duck arr. by Doug Hawkins, Rawhide, Indians, and the ever infamous School's Out For Summer in the 4th quarter. We played it better than Oregon. We lost the game, but we played so well that most people forgot about the game an hour after."
"We do things like push ups and sit ups and wall sits before band starts just for the heck of it."
"We arrange songs to make fun of things. Matt Pavek and Mary McPartlin made up the Love Boat because everybody hated the Titanic show."
On the 1999 Sun Bowl: "During the game we just blew Oregon out of the water. Les Mis was so loud that CBS had to turn down our microphone! To make a long story short, we, the Bones, asserted our claim as Rank of the Millennium with our snappy slide covers, Rubber Duck arr. by Doug Hawkins, Rawhide, Indians, and the ever infamous School's Out For Summer in the 4th quarter. We played it better than Oregon. We lost the game, but we played so well that most people forgot about the game an hour after."
"We do things like push ups and sit ups and wall sits before band starts just for the heck of it."
"We arrange songs to make fun of things. Matt Pavek and Mary McPartlin made up the Love Boat because everybody hated the Titanic show."
DISCLAIMER: The thoughts and opinions expressed on this site do not reflect the thoughts and opinions of the University of Minnesota Marching Band, or the University of Minnesota.
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